Author Topic: Ashley for Prime Minister  (Read 948 times)

Offline CraigDoyle

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Ashley for Prime Minister
« on: November 11, 2016, 10:21:00 am »
Fresh from the news that Donald Trump has secured his term in the White House as President of the United States of America, the potential for businessmen to make the move into political office surely cannot be missed.

I'm proposing that following his success in dominating the high street sportswear market that Mike Ashley now run for Prime Minister. I figure under his stewardship the House of Commons will be run as a much tighter ship. MPs can be put on zero hours contracts at the national minimum wage with no expenses for such inconvenient things like travel & accommodation.

Trade deals can be negotiated expertly with Mike's 'park the tanks on the lawn' strategy...but this time with actual tanks. Immigration is again not a problem. Mike will be in the market for cheap Western European imports, particularly from France & Belgium.

We are all aware that Mike has a great network of contacts from down his local boozer from which he can fill his cabinet. Boris Johnson can be replaced by the much more pleasant and resourceful Joe Kinnear. Mild mannered Joe being the expert in communication that he is can lift the phone to 'just about anyone' and in no way will he insult foreign delegates by getting their names wrong.

I feel I'm onto something here...

Offline trophy4toon

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Re: Ashley for Prime Minister
« Reply #1 on: November 12, 2016, 11:48:49 am »
Don't forget he could employ his family members in various posts too.
Also the amazon delivery drivers he's already looking to hire could be used as chauffeur's for the royal family. Particularly the ones who go to the toilet in a box in their van to avoid losing time.